I hate these specific dreams that keep coming back to me. I haven't had them in a long time and they didn't start again until a couple of days ago. And they've been coming back on an interval of every other night.
They're sort of like tortures of the past, to put it in a dramatic way. They're equally as powerful and effect me so emotionally in my sleep. That's why when I wake up it always feels like it was real and I get confused and wonder how come it wasn't. Once I actually found myself crying - both in my sleep and as I awoke. Because the dream was so real, so emotional, such a dream-come-true, that you didn't want to find yourself in reality...
That must have happened to everyone, right? I don't even understand why I have these dreams or where they come from!? Well I could understand before, but not now - it's so illogical! I thought that I was past this? And also, it has the perfect timing (sarcasm) just like a lot of things in life...
Either way, last night's dream was a ball of emotions. A mixture of happiness, sadness, envy, jealousy, regret, "what if's" and wishful thinking. So many things, so much confusion.
At least I didn't find myself or wake up crying... I suppose that's a bit of a good sign?
